The140Plus
Thursday, September 9, 2021
Nice Guys: Why do they finish last?
Wednesday, October 28, 2020
The 3 types of partners: Teammates, Cheerleaders, & Competitors
Thursday, February 20, 2020
"Be My Peace"
Wednesday, October 30, 2019
When Life Gives You Lemons...
Let's say you own a classic automobile. The body is perfect. You knocked out all of the dents, and then added a fresh coat of paint. Threw some nice rims on it. The interior is plush, fresh leather, all of the instruments are brand new. The car looks great. You put the car on the market to sell. A guy reaches out to you about it. So you guys schedule an appointment. He shows up, you tell him, "nice car isn't it?" He says, "looks nice but I'm ready to start her up, see how it runs!"
So you start it up, it takes a minute to start, then when it does, it shutters a bit. There's also a slight pinging noise. You can tell that the buyer is a bit worried.
He says "let's open the hood". So you guys open the hood, and there's rust everywhere, and leaks from some of the hoses. It appears the entire engine needs to be replaced or at the very least, needs major work.
So the buyer says, "you know what, you've put a lot of work into the appearance of the vehicle but it doesn't seem like you put any work into making it run efficiently, and for what you're asking for, this car just needs too much work. I'm going to pass on it."
You see, you can have a beautiful looking car but when you place it on the market, someone who's a serious buyer, who's actually going to take care of it, knows the difference between something that's going to last a very long time and something that's going to break down a month after purchase.
A lot of people take this same approach with themselves. We spend so much time in the gym, getting in shape, or beautifying ourselves, but many never put the same amount of work into getting our minds right, and changing bad habits. We think, "I can have anybody I want if I can just get in good shape, or if I had this look", but realistically, that's no different than throwing paint on a poorly-running car.
So take a look deep within and put yourself out there as a complete individual, not half of one, hoping someone will take a discount on you.
God bless
Tuesday, July 9, 2019
A Proud Father
Cant believe I have a 12 year old. Time goes hella fast. I still believe the scariest moment in my life is when me and her mother split and I was on my own, the first day she was dropped off to me, I had no idea what to do. I called my mom and she eased my mind like she always does.
She was a 1 year old and didn't cry much at all. We became best buddies during that time.
I would have conversations with her, she would respond like she knew what I was talking about. Maybe she did.... I'd lay her on my chest as I sat on the couch beating the breaks off her uncles in Madden on Xbox live as she slept(true story).
When she started walking, she'd just take off running, I literally had to hold her hand everywhere we went or she'd just take off lol, hands in the air like a Scooby-Doo character. Good times.
I'm just glad she's into tech, video games, and anime and not these young knucklehead whippersnappers..... Yet.... I'm sure that day will come and when it does we'll have a mature conversation about it.
As a father raising a daughter, I don't think there's much I can teach her about being a woman, what I can do is do my best to teach her what a man is suppose to be by being that man for her. If she chooses wrong, I'll look at that as a direct reflection of my impact on her.
One day I'll pass the torch willingly and step back knowing she's in good hands.
Sincerely,
A Proud dad.
Friday, July 5, 2019
Why men should learn to fish
So imagine you’re at a lake. Women represent Fisherman. Each woman has their own boat with a fishing rod.
Below the water are the men who represents the fish. Certain men have more to offer/less baggage and that makes them more desired and sought after.
So Women throw their line in the water using bait. Their bait consists of their beauty, their youth, their ability to nurture, etc. The more a woman has to offer, the more men flock to this bait, leaving a lot of other women who have less to offer/more baggage unbothered.
So sooner or later, the women who aren’t attracting much action say “screw this, I’m jumping in the water, I’m tired of waiting, all of these women have less to offer than me underneath the surface, if only I can get ahead of them somehow.”.
But now, evolution has taken place. Not only are there men in the water, there are women too. With that, now there are men saying “screw this”, every time I see the kind of bait I like, 100 other men flock to it and it’s hard for her to even see me and what really sets me apart if she’s constantly trying to fend off all of these unworthy individuals.
So, he gets his own boat, his own fishing pole and attached to it, his own bait. His bait consists of his ability to protect, lead, and provide, along with charisma, style, power, confidence, etc.
So he tosses his line in the water and gets criticized by the other women who finally see his value.
“Hey, you’re not suppose to be up here, get back down in the water! That’s not masculine, that’s not what REAL men do. I refuse to come to a man!”
But this man has so many women on his line trying to go for his bait that it’s intriguing to many of these other women, and women who are competitive by nature, begin to turn their attention towards this man and what he has to offer, even if only for those competitive reasons.
This is how the average man has started to win in today’s society and why men who take this approach are shamed. It has nothing to do with him being less of a man, but more so about taking advantage of the platforms we’ve been given.
So instead of the typical approach where you see someone you like and begin to audition for their interest in you, be seen and be active. Showcase your talents and your mindset and not to any one in specific, but to everybody. If you're intriguing enough, you'll begin to stand out and that ultimately leads to creating your own value. Value attracts value.
God bless.
Saturday, April 20, 2019
Hypergamy vs Loyalty: The unpopular opinion
- the quality of being loyal.
"her loyalty to her husband of 34 years"- a strong feeling of support or allegiance.plural noun: loyalties
- I think most of my life, I was conditioned to believe that women were inherently good and loyal. After all, It's usually the women that have to put up with the cheating and abuse in relationships and for the most part, they'll stick through it. When a woman typically settles down with a man, it's because she see's something in him that makes him valuable to her survival. These are the natural instincts of a woman. This is what the term hypergamy is referencing. A woman is more likely to put up with a man who’s polygamous in nature when his resources make him the best available option to her. When his value lowers or hers raises, the dynamic changes and her nature kicks in. He becomes less attractive and she sets her sights on the next best available option. When you examine this behavior and compare it to the definition of loyalty, we come to find out that it’s actually the furthest thing from it. The truth is, women are about as loyal as their options allow them to be. As long as you remain to be “that dude” in her eyes, you’ll be in good standing with her. But if her loyalty is conditional based, is it really loyalty?
Men are more likely to stay with a woman even when he’s lost attraction to her. When a man isn’t happy, his polygamous nature is more likely to kick in but he returns home and he’ll continue to do so until she one day decides to leave him. This is why women indeed initiate the majority of breakups.
“Until recently, studies had only been done on the breaks-ups of heterosexual married couples, and it had been found that the leading gender who initiated these break-ups were female.
As part of his analysis, Rosenfeld found that women initiated 69 percent of all divorces, compared to 31 percent for men. In contrast, there was not a statistically significant difference between the percentage of breakups initiated by unmarried women and men, regardless of whether they had been cohabitating with their partners. Since the 1940’s, women have been the dominant initiator of divorce. It is thought that this is because women are more sensitive to relationship problems than men.” -Women and Men: Whose More Likely to Initiate a Break Up?
By Mike Bundrant
Have you ever heard the term “happy wife happy life”? Well, as unfair as that concept is, it’s not entirely untrue. Women are not conditioned to remain in relationships where they are unhappy while we men are. Our leashes are incredibly short when we date up. By dating up, for men, I’m referring to men who date women with more resources than him. When his resources are greater, this affects her overall state of happiness and influences her ability to remain “loyal” to him. To her, you’re easily replaceable because you’re merely an accessory to her already established lifestyle.
If you need further proof of women and their hypergamous nature, simply study women who believe they can take the taken man away from his woman. She attempts to pry information from him about his situation in hopes that she can highlight certain attributes in her character to make herself more valuable than his woman. If his relationship is lacking sex, she will become more freaky, aggressive, and a more willing sex partner. If his wife never cooks, she will be a chef to him. And at the end of the day, he still doesn't leave, she becomes upset, and this is where the drama ensues. To her, she played her cards right based on her belief in hypergamy and how it relates to a woman’s true nature. But men simply do not think this way. A man who initiates a breakup probably does so because he’s simply sick and tired of her shit, not because he found a better option. On the flip side, men are often blindsided by women who opt to leave because men believe that as long as they are good guys, and put their woman first, she’ll remain as loyal to him as he is to her. It doesn't matter how good of a man you are, if your resources diminish or she has reached the point to where she knows she can attain a man with more resources, you will become more unattractive to her and she will eventually level up. (This is when she starts picking little fights with you about things that never mattered before).
- Ironically, men are often referred to as dogs, and as derogatory as that term may be, it’s pretty accurate based on our nature. Dogs are considered one of the most loyal household pets if not the most loyal. “A dog may roam but he always returns home”. It's also why when a lot of men cheat, they can either cheat up or down because it's never their intention to level up. They are simply looking for a release, not an escape. Ask most women what they think about the woman that their man cheated on them with for reference.
So when you actually study the nature of men and women, you come to the conclusion that men might actually be the more loyal sex. Because marriage, for better or for worse, until death do us part, is all conditional based when it comes to the other side.
You tell me.